Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Bittersweet

In the next 8 weeks or less, champ will be here. Someone asked me at the prental yoga class yesterday, "Wont you miss being pregnant?", well, I guess not. I feel so done with pregnancy already. I cant wait for the baby to be here in real life. For me to hold, kiss, dress and change.

I have probably experienced EVERY symptom in the book. Faced a new challenge everyday. From nausea, sleeplessness, extreme fatigue, sleeping all day long going without food, forgetfulness, some serious cravings, cramping, heartburn,  and many many more!!

I am so done.

I think I will miss the little fluttering when the baby somersaults and kicks though. It feels awesome sometimes and hurts sometimes. This is probably the only feeling I want to remember, and sadly it cannot be captured by any smart phone or a DSLR.

Its going to be one crazy roller-coaster when he actually arrives. I know that too. And being so afraid of that roller-coaster, I wish he remains inside. But I feel so heavy and clumsy, that I cannot wait to get him out of the stomach and fit back into my jeans and get back to living my life.

But then, once he is here, I will spend every second of my life worrying and thinking about him.  Like a piece of my heart walking outside my body. He is probably safer inside?

 Bittersweet it is. And will be, for the rest of my life.

 


Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Hello 2013

And, another year comes to an end. 2012, a year full of surprises, shocks, joys, denials and eventually acceptance.

Finished a half-marathon.
Quit my job.
Moved halfway accross the world from Bangalore to Sunnyvale, CA
Became a Vedics volunteer and helped be a small part of Velukkudi Krishnan swamy's awesome Bay Area visit.
Took a major major life decision of becoming a parent and the little one is expected on March 28th 2013. Balaji and me are superbly excited and cannot wait for him to come!
Experiencing the highs and some super lows that come with Pregnancy.
Organised Valakappu and Seemantham, entirely on our own and made it alive :)
Can read Tamizh slowly now. 2013 will be much better. I promise myself!
Music, writing, books and running took a major backseat this year.
Can wear a madisaar on my own. #WIN
Travelled to Mangalore, Auroville, Local SFO, Lake Tahoe, Mendocino, Santa Cruz.

2013 should have some pretty simple goals:
Learn madi aacharam and Nityanusandhanam.
Be a good mommy and try not to drop the baby down. These wodden floors..sigh.
Sing more.
Write more.
Shed pregnancy weight and get back to shape.
Get a part-time job.
India trip. Yay!

Hope the year is filled with loads of joy and good health!

Have a wonderful 2013 folks!