Monday, November 17, 2008

Straight from my heart

Chitthi na koi sandes, jaane woh konsa des, jahaan tum chale gaye.

A simple song with simple lyrics, had my eyes wet with tears.

Its my wedding. And my elder sister wont be there.She had promised to be there though. During one of those little games we used to play as kids, she said,"Vasu, unnoda kalyanathukku naan pink podavai kattippen". (I will wear a pink saree at your wedding)

Such a helpless feeling it is, to have lost someone and never being able to see them again. Never get a chance to hug them and tell them , that "Hey, i love you.You are very very precious to me.". Baby, my wedding will never be complete without you. I will wear a pink saree for you to see.

Do come and do keep your promise. I know you will. I will miss you in every moment. In every song and in every smile. Stay at peace wherever you are. I Love you yaar. Wish i could hug you and rest my head on your shoulder. For me to smell that lovely perfume of yours. For you to reassure me that everything will be fine.For you to say , "Onnum illa yaaar, nee venum naa paaren.." .I wish i could get those little tips and advices that you would have given, if you were around. I wish i could have spoken to you and confided everything about my relationship to you.Told you what a great guy i am getting married to and i wish i could have seen that peaceful smile on your face.

Your voice sometimes rings in my ears and makes me look around to see if you are by chance around calling me.

This post is dedicated you Utthra. The only one i confided in all my childhood secrets and confessed every prank of mine to. All those secrets are safe now. You took them all with you.Noone will ever be what you are to me. I end this post here. My eyes are terribly blurred.

This is to you!

My best friend.My Akka.My Utths.

PS: For a long time i kept this saved as a draft. And did not want to publish this. But posting it anyway, for reasons unknown to the writer herself.


Ramkumar R. Aiyengar said...

cha.. I don't know the story, but I surely can feel the emotion in this post.. :'(

Vasumathi Sridharan said...

@ramku, I was putting off writing about her for the past 4 years.. because writing will mean acceptance. Acceptance that she is gone. And i have not even reached that stage yet. I still pretend that she is living @ airport road and is too busy to call me. :'( indeed.

Archana Achuthan said...

Iam @ a loss for words... I can simply feel your emotion in each word!!Your sis will be really proud of u vasu... Where ever she is!!

Vasumathi Sridharan said...

@Archana, I dont know if she will be proud of me or not. This was simply a rant (thats what most so-called-bloggers use their blog for).

Thanks for taking time to comment :-)

Maythini said...

cha...its sad to lose someone you lvoe so much. Hell, its sad to lose someone. I'll never know..hope I never do.

She 'll be looking down upon you and smiling..watching you wear her pink saree :)
Take care choo :')

Vasumathi Sridharan said...

@Myth, i hope u never ever know the feeling. Only sooper-good things happen to my myth :D

Dankooo.. Muah . >:D<