Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Shashti Poorthi

We dont celebrate 50 as grandly as we do the 60th.

Shashtiaapthapoorthi (Completion of 60) marks a new beginning in a person's life.

Heres to you my dear 60th Post.

PS:I actually forgot to celebrate 50, so i am covering it up by using hi-funda words and all :D

Friday, September 26, 2008

Confessions of a little girl, who has grown-up to be a woman.

Its 2.30AM..i toss and turn and suddenly unable to sleep any longer, i just get up and sit. My thoughts drift to him.

YES. Am guilty. Terribly guilty. And i am going to confess..Here.

I have hurt someone. There, i said it. I should not have done this to him.

"I am getting married", i said softly. Almost to myself. He became quiet. Just so very quiet. Suddenly, that silence spoke way too loud..I never understood him.. He has been with me for so long now. People always saw us together. Some even went to the extent of saying we look so cute together and so very alike (both by nature and looks!)!! He picked me up everytime i fell down. Listening as i raved and ranted. Correcting me when i was wrong.Showing me the right way of doing things. Our tastes so alike. In food, music and general outlook towards life. Smiling proudly as i did something worthy. Clapped the loudest each time i sang or got an award. Always been there for me.Silently. The best friend. Always the hero. Always my saviour.

And i left him for another guy. The realization hit me ..and hit me hard. Pained me endlessly. It moved me to tears. So much that i was sobbing in the middle of the night. But then, theres nothing i can do. I have to go. Set off on a new journey. He has to move on. And i know he will. For my sake. I also know he will wish me very well,because thats what he has wanted all along.He just wanted to see me happy and smiling. And i am sure he will. My special-one will ensure that.

This is to tell him, that i love him too. As much as he loves me. Not in that way, but i still do.Cheers! I am your little girl and I will always be your little girl.

Who He is, is anyone's guess.This is to you Daddy. >:D<

Sue loves You. With all her heart.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Another One!

This is one terrific tag! Answers in one word only! I tag..You!

1. Your cell phone? Essential
2. Your significant other? BalajiN
3. Your hair? Falling :-(
4. Your mummy? Divine
5. Your daddy? Strongest
6. Your favorite thing? Bean-bag :D
7. Your dream last night? Scray
8. The room you're in? Drawing-Room
9. Your fear? Being-unloved
10. What you're not? Sane
11. The last thing you did before logging on? Slept
12. Where did you grow up? Bangalore
13. Favourite drink? Tender-Coconut
14. What are you wearing? Perfume
15. Your TV? Switched-off.
16. Your pet? Charu
17. Your computer? Dusty
18. Favourite place? Salagramam
19. Your mood right now? Hyper-Happy
20. Missing someone? you-bet!
21. Something you're not wearing? Gloves
22. Love someone? Yes!!!!!
23. Your favorite color? Pink
24. Kids? Other's
25. Your life? Effervescent


As you can see, i am rottenly bored. Am at home and sick of it. Just spent 2 hours searching for a new template and set font-colors to match it.

Someone take me out no, Please! I desperately want to go out and eat bhel puri , golgappe and chocolate ice-cream and all things nice. Please take me out. I am asking with my sweetest smile...EVER. Ok, no bhel, atleast an ice-cream?? I am allowed an ice-cream for Christ's sake!! I really am!

Getting all random_max thoughts staying at home. Doing absolutely cranky mad things. A song is in repeat mode for the last 3 days. Dance to it at 1AM. Read till 2AM. Get nightmares and wake up suddenly.Blog hopping like crazy. Have a wild desire scream loudly. Feeling completely void. Strange restlessness. There is this loud silence.

Have a bitter taste in my mouth. Completely developed aversion for food. The sight of it sickenns me. Sulk and throw tantrums everytime ma gets a plate of bland food.

Just the craving for ice-cream remains.

Only look forward to drink Live52.

Gaze at my mobile phone and will it to ring. It never rings these days .Even if it does, 'none' of the conversations last longer than 3mins and 20 seconds. So, call me and talk to me no? For longer than 3 mins and 20seconds.Thanks and i love you.

Refresh my Gmail some 100times hoping to have recieved a nice mushy e-mail. The screen looks at me and says "Nice Try..but better luck next time" :-(_max

Yes, i am in a great mood and my life is totally rocking at the moment. I am celebrating. All good things are happening.

Bhooo....i want to hide under the bed and feel like a 5 year old again...

PS: I wont blame you, if you think i have lost it.I swear.God-Promise. *holding-my-throat*

Here I Come

I am the latest Kitty Kat in town.



Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Drama from 2 Thru 5

Out of sheer boredom and frustration, and lack of having anything useful to do, i am doing a self tag on childhood memories between the age of 2 to 5.

#1. I was 2 years old i think. I remember my mom playing the veena and me singing and dad recording the session.I was wearing a green umbrella cut frock with white flowers.Ma was wearing a maroon saree.

#2. I remember dad teaching me to play badminton when i was probably 5.Have a vivid memory of it.

#3. I remember ma and pa took me to Kanyakumari. I remember watching the sunset, and for some reason i was crying. Mummy took me to a prayer hall. The silence there killed me. I had a strong desire to scream. And scream i did.Louuuuudly. An elderly spectacled gentleman turned and said "shhhh..quiet child". Mummy dragged me away from there. I turned back, glared at him and stuck my tongue out at him. :P

#4.Remember being falling ill.The doctor arranging for drips to be given at home. Remember my maternal granpa coming to see me, and touching the drip and asking "enna idhu? why did the child fall ill?" with a terribly worried look.

#5. I remember my great-grandmother sitting on a bench and i was running about and playing. She called me and taught me "Vara veena mrudu paaNi" geetham in mOhana raagam. For some reason , this rAgam remains an eternal favourite. Instantly makes me happy!

#6. I remember my first day of school very vividly. Every detail.

#7. I remember a Ganesh Chaturthi. My grandmom had made a nice mantap and bought 2 small umbrellas for ganesha.I wanted one for my doll-house. They refused to give it to me.I threw a fit. Finally my granddad gave it to me and wiped my tears.

#8. I remember my granddad sitting in the swing and chewing betel leaves and me sleeping on his lap. Most of my afternoons would be spent this way. Somehow a swing is such an integral part of my memories. Was thilled to bits when dad bought a swing for our house. I still spend so much time on it. Swinging to glory and practicing music or just well..swinging.

#9.Remember seeing charu for the first time in the hospital. So tiny , pink and chubby. then saw my dad and mom playing with her and petting her. Felt an inexplicable pang.I never liked her much when she was a baby. But ya, the only reason i used to go to hospital to see her, was that tatha had kept a box of chocolates in the draw and i was allowed 1 per day :-)

#10. Remember chasing away my music teacher who used to come home to teach me. Used to hide under the bed when she used to come. Finally amma appa gave up and told her i wont be learnign anymore from her. Never liked her much.

#11. Remember playing hide-and-seek with cousins. Hid myself in my grandpa's cupboard and fell asleep. My cousins could not find me. The household was completely panicky. They thought i had got lost or even worse kidnapped! My granddad found me when he came to look for a change of his dhothi!

#12. I would eat everyday only if i saw a goat.My granddad would carry me and go in search of one. Then arranged for a guy to bring 2 goats daily to our place just to have a more peaceful dinner time without my tantrums.

#13. I remember my cousin making me sing "Vande Mataram" in the hall filled with all of mom's side people. My grandma remarked to my mom. 'All the kids study well. Dont pressurize her to study.Make her sing instead.'

#14. Every sunday daddy used to buy a ring for me. And after 2 days i used to misplace it.

#15. My maternal grandma used to make the world's best onion-raita. I used to wake her up at 11pm and ask her to make upma and onion-raita for me.

Thse are some that i vividly remember. Infact i remember loads of stuff. Will pen down as and when i have energy to type. Off now.

Peace to you All,

Monday, September 22, 2008


5 Times since morning, I have clicked the 'New Post' link, and closed it.

Words do not cometh. Sleep not cometh either.

Words are over.

Am done.

/*Yay! This is a post.*/
Time to hit the 'Publish Post' button. Colon Pipe.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

I Like

I like rain,rainbow,chocolates,chat,
I like window shopping,popcorn and masti.
I like buying gifts and surprising people,
I like taking pics and capturing moments in my little camera.

I like movies and music,
I like reading philosophy,
I like engineers and thinkers,
I like to give gyaan and feel important.

I like being amidst people,
I like dancing (even though i cant dance to save my life)
I like the smell of wet sand and freshly brewed coffee,
I like little children and flowers.

I like writing,dreaming,star-gazing.
I like singing (because i can)
I like smiling and seeing people smile.
I like myself.

So much for being humble. :D

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Jaundice and me...

I dread the question "How are you?". I dont know how to answer it.

1 Week. In and out of hospitals and that leaves me scared more of nurses than doctors. All they did was poke practice. 15 pokes and 1 constant poke point for the drip, left me paranoid everytime the room door opened.

Food without salt,sugar,oil and other essentials tastes pretty neat. :-|

Live52 is yummy. Really. Atleast it has some taste.

The only reason i am celebrating. Lost 3kgs , muft mein. Intend to loose 5 more.